The Magic Fortune Teller
You are about to consult the magic oracle. Think hard about your question. Allow the numbers one to seven to swirl around in your head. Which number is calling to you? Settle the number firmly in your mind.
Find the card below that bears your number. This is the future that will befall.
Remember, the cards never lie!
If your number is 1
Your card is: The Night Out
Do not let your dog out during the full moon. Beware shellfish! Do not have sushi tonight.
If your number is 2
Your card is The Naturists
This is a good time for that holiday somewhere warm where you can enjoy sun, sea, sand and other delights beginning with s.
Do not overdo the sangria or you could end up seeing things that are not there.
If your number is 3
Your card is The Fool on the Hill
It's time to make a choice: woo your lover or go mountain climbing. You can not do both at once. Remember, the mountains are no place for family pets. Email me at email@example.com for a kennel brochure.
If your number is 4
Your card is The Bar Tender
Beware of mixing your drinks. You don't want to end up in a Roman toga, barefoot and falling in the gutter with no idea how you got there. Stick to Cola.
If your number is 5
Your card is The Veterinary Assistant
If your cat needs the dentist, do not try and treat him at home. He may look a sweetie but once you get your hand in his mouth it will be a different matter. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org for for details of vets in your area.
If your number is 6
Your card is The Seeker
Watch out for lost contact lenses. Trying to find them in the dark is no joke whatever anyone says. If you do not wear contact lenses, then take care not to lose glasses, watches, pens or frying pans.
If your number is 7
Your card is The Star.
If you are trying to become a centrefold model you will succeed. Success is also foretold for all projects involving nudity, water, and photography. If your project combines all three then email me at email@example.com for a brochure.
For entertainment purposes only. The future is not guaranteed.
For a more detailed forecast at a very low fee contact firstname.lastname@example.org