Sunday, August 18, 2013

The Return

So, I'm back from France after two weeks without internet and I'm still sane. Whee, gibber, gibber.

Going cold turkey didn't affect me at all. My hovercraft is full of eels.

It's fine. You just have to decide not to care that you can't check anything online, play any games, find any crochet patterns, or chat to any friends. Life without google is great. No really, you should try it. You should all try it.


I spoke more bad French in the last two weeks than I have for years and the French graciously pretended to understand me. I ate too much rich food and I don't fit my waistbands. It was great.

But now I'm back, and other than Whirl cruelly deleting my comments on his blog, what's happening round here these days?

Edited to change helicopter to hovercraft because lack of internet is more damaging than you'd think. (Thanks, Simon!)


Whirlochre said...

Holidays without the internet are a luxury I remember well.

I quite like being uncontactable. Plus, there's the thrill of 'catching up' when you get home. I won't forget my own 'pre-France' blog post of 2008. It was like my house had been used for a wild party in my absence.

I'm trying to resist the lure of the Everweb. I got very good at not answering my mobile phone when it suited me (and this I did as part of my 'control the stimuli in your life' plan) but recent hardware developments (wifi in your underpants) have left me vulnerable to once-an-hour checkathipopsing. All very annoying.

As for deleting your comments, you'll know from the handwritten letter I sent accompanying the £100 'don't diss me' bribe that it was only a stupid accident.

Did you bring back plenty of cider? I still have mine (we watched it being made with the aid of a mule on a treadmill).

fairyhedgehog said...

We brought back loads of cider but not nearly enough, probably only a week's worth. Maybe that's what I should spend the £100 compensation on: some more cider.

Although of course nothing, nothing can compensate for the deep hurt I feel at having my insightful comments classified as spam. Except maybe for a few bucketfuls of cider and several pounds of chocolate but I'm not sure a hundred quid is enough to cover the amount of chocolate needed.

Lexi said...

"...the French graciously pretended to understand me."

FH, are you sure it was France you were in? I don't think the French do that. Lip pursing and eyebrow raising, yes, graciousness much less likely. I can only conclude you speak French like a native and are being modest.

fairyhedgehog said...

Lexi, they treated my husband pretty much the same and his French can only be described as halting, and then only if you're being generous! They seemed to like it that we were both making the effort instead of taking it for granted that they'd speak English.

And they're wonderful at dragging everyone into their Breton dances, even those of us who can only dance slightly better than a four year old (and aren't nearly as cute)!

Old Kitty said...

Whirlygig did what?!?!?!

Well there goes his doily. Tut-tut!

Awww lovely Fairyhedgehog!!! You're BACK!!!! And google? Quelle est google?! Me no comprende!!

And how could you say about your waistbands when all you've had is salad! I mean that's a big plate of rabbit food!! That's like zero calories!! :-)

Take care

fairyhedgehog said...

Hi Kitty, yes, Whirl has been a very naughty boy and has to suffer the consequences.

If only we had stuck to rabbit food all holiday. Sadly, pain au chocolat and chocolate mousses don't have zero calories and although holiday calories don't count, nobody told my waistline that.

Now I'm back to reality with a cat (Bonnie) with an ear infection and a gazillion forms to fill out for my new job. But I have the internets! Yay!

Simon Kewin said...

Welcome back! I thought it was a hovercraft that was full of eels?

fairyhedgehog said...

Simon, thanks for the welcome back and the correction!

My internet-free time must have left me even more loopy than I'd realised!

I googled what comes after the eel-filled hovercraft and I think I'll leave "do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?" where it lies. So much that I'd forgotten...

batgirl said...

Welcome back! I think it's only the Parisians who are snotty about imperfect French language. They probably make fun of Breton accents too.
I hope Bonnie's ear is better soon.

fairyhedgehog said...

batgirl, nice to see you again! I think you're right about the Parisians; I know that the Bretons were very welcoming.

Oh, and Bonnie is fine now except for needing her ear washed out twice a day to which she objects vehemently!

Lisa said...

I love my email/facebook - would rather have it AND vacation - I can stop at anytime.

fairyhedgehog said...

Lisa, next time we go away, Wifi will be a priority! It was just too hard to find Wifi as well as booking travel and accommodation for six adults in two cars, and each couple travelling home on a different ferry crossing!

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